volunteerplaintalk

Category: volunteer retention

  • 5 Ways to Get Off the Passive Aggressive Roller Coaster

    Kumba_at_Busch_Gardens_Tampa

     

    Glenda, an office manager and volunteer coordinator for a public school enjoys a good working relationship with the rest of the school staff, except for Ms. Riley,  the vice principal. As Glenda recalls,  “One day the vice principal, Miss Riley complained about our volunteers in a PTA meeting. She claimed that none of the volunteers were signing in and that we were losing most of our volunteer hours. Honestly, I was shocked when she said it. Instead of coming to me to ask about it, she chose to throw it out and make me look like I wasn’t doing my job. Besides, only two volunteers out of fifty did not sign in for that month and someone happened to mention that insignificant statistic to Miss Riley and she just assumed all the volunteers were not signing in. I was so frustrated I didn’t know what to say so I just sat there. I wished I had a good comeback.”

    Yes, Glenda, we’ve all experienced insufferable passive aggressive managers and staff. Snide little comments, copying department heads on jabbing emails and rehashing a volunteer error in staff meetings are their emotional roller coasters that just go off track and belittle volunteer managers. So what can we do? Do we have to ride this frustrating coaster or can we simply just get off?

    Well, for what it’s worth,  I finally got really tired of a few passive aggressive staff who routinely dragged me onto their caustic car and I decided to say no to their desire to control my emotions with their passive aggressive behavior. So, here are my suggestions on ways to respond to these staff members who want to get a “rise” out of you.

    1. Check your emotions. The point of the passive aggressive staff member’s snarky behavior is to get you emotionally involved. Quash those emotions and become professionally detached. The staff member who loves to goad people will get no satisfaction from your neutral demeanor and will seek other prey.
    2. Don’t strike back. If you don’t like the tone of an unreasonable emailed request that is copied to department heads and meant to bait you, begin your reply with a cool, unruffled, “Thank you for your confidence in the volunteer department. It is always our goal to provide the very best volunteers for each situation and to treat our clients with the respect and professional service they deserve. Because I view this request with the same importance as every request, I will keep you posted on our progress every step of the way.” The passive aggressive staff wants you to complain that the request is unreasonable, so don’t jump on that ride.
    3. Make them prove it. When a staff member complains that “the volunteer requests are not being met on time,” pin them down with, “Can you give me concrete examples of requests that were not met on time? Without specifics, I really cannot make improvements and it is my sincere desire to continually improve volunteer services. So, what are those examples?” Broad statements without factual backup are a favored route of the passive aggressive staff so make them give you something that you can work with.
    4. Deflect unwarranted blame in a professional way. Called out in a meeting because a staff member did not get something done and they want to blame lack of volunteers? Pick the right moment to stand up and say, “While it is unfortunate that we were only able to get 3 volunteers for this request, I would just like to take this opportunity to reiterate that volunteer services will do everything in our power to supply the right volunteers for all requests. Obviously the sooner we get a request, the more time we have to engage our volunteers.  Last minute requests will be treated with high importance, but sometimes we have more than one last minute request.” Don’t get into finger-pointing but take the opportunity to educate staff on how to request volunteers.
    5. Defend the volunteers in a professional manner. Passive aggressive staff that “joke” about volunteer mistakes or qualifications can be reminded that volunteers are real people who give of their time and accomplish much for clients. Try saying, “While yes, volunteer Mary didn’t send that visitor to the right station yesterday, did you know that she is caring for her seriously ill husband right now and is admittedly, a little scattered? It’s amazing that she takes her volunteer job so seriously that she continues to come in for her shift, don’t you think? And even more amazing is that Mary donated over 300 hours last year in our reception area.”  Staff members need to see volunteers as real human beings who donate valuable service time.

    The sad reality about passive aggressive staff is they are not really serious about teamwork and solutions. They are not interested in honest communication but instead, want to manipulate our emotions and drag us along on their melodramatic trek.

    With some staff members you have to stick to a strictly professional, emotionless communication. When they realize that they cannot involve you in pointless emotional back and forth, they will move on.

    While it’s unfortunate that some folks have little interest in teamwork and solutions, you don’t have to indulge them. Volunteer managers have far too much meaningful work to do to get caught up in mind games.

    Even though roller coasters are meant to be fun, passive aggressive roller coasters are neither fun nor productive. You don’t have to get on one.

    -Meridian

  • Warm Bodies, Cold, Hard Facts

    Qtips

    “What a massive responsibility, being a moral creature”
    ― Isaac Marion, Warm Bodies

    Does this line of questioning sound oh so familiar?  “Why don’t we have enough volunteers to be an Emergency Buddy? How hard can it be to find people willing to be called in the middle of the night to come by our headquarters to get the emergency plan for the district, drive out to the emergency shelter and then get a shelter spot ready for arrival? I mean c’mon, do you not know how important this volunteer job is? Have you actually tried targeted recruiting? There must be scads of retired emergency personnel who would love to use their talents to help us.”

    Well, huh. Why didn’t I think of that the last twelve times I tried targeted recruiting, or maybe I was wrong to try and think out of the box by recruiting those great college students.  Perhaps I should lie to potential volunteers so that they don’t know what the job entails? I’m sure that once they realize we lied to them, they’ll forgive us and won’t do a lousy job just because we trained them improperly .

    There’s a study that indicates companies spend more resources  weeding out lousy employees than they do cultivating superior talent. This lopsided approach often applies to organizational views on volunteer recruitment.

    toxic workers are more expensive than superstar hires

    The more important the volunteer role, the more up front work is required in order to place excellent and ready volunteers. Proper vetting, orientation and training takes time and effort by hard working volunteer managers.

    Sure, warm bodies can fill roles, but cold, hard facts say that

    Warm bodies ultimately:

    Leave abruptly, usually within the first three months

    Do not sync with the organization and remain on the outside

    Can do irreparable harm to clients

    Volunteer managers understand how much effort it takes to cultivate a qualified volunteer. Because we abhor the “warm body” theory, we will continue to be accused of not providing “enough” volunteers for critical roles.

    When pressured by senior management to magically produce more bodies, point to the lack of  harmful behavior by your competent volunteers. Remind them that properly vetted and trained volunteers do not damage the very people we serve and oh, yeah, properly vetted and trained volunteers take time and skill to implement.

    And maybe ask the person this question: “Would you want a hastily recruited and insufficiently trained volunteer working with your mother, father or child?”

    Neither would we.

    -Meridian

     

     

  • It’s 2pm and Everyone is Leaving for the Holidays Except…

     

    laptop

    I’m just going to say it: Volunteers are expected to work holidays. Every single holiday, every single time. No exceptions.

    Sonia, the volunteer coordinator for a busy health care clinic was approached on December 21st last year by the CEO. “We need you to round up a few volunteers to man the front desk on Christmas day so that our receptionists can be with their families. Thanks.”
    Sonia stammered, “But the volunteers want to be with their families too. I don’t know that I can find anyone. A great number of them are going out of town.” The CEO just stared at her and so she hurriedly added, “but I will do my best as always.”

    Ahh, the holidays or as I like to call them, the “hol the heck in the world will I find all these volunteers days”.
    I remember one year being asked to “get” volunteers to go into nursing homes on Christmas day to deliver  baskets of goodies for the staff  who were working that day.

    When suggesting that volunteers could deliver the baskets on Christmas eve or another day, I got a peevish look. “We want it to be for the staff working that day and we want them to you know, remember us for thinking of them on the actual holiday.”

    Oh, so you want the volunteers to spend their holidays marketing, is that it? Then, why are you paying a marketing specialist? And why are we thinking of everyone else on the holidays except our volunteers?

    But back to Sonia who sighed and said, ” I do not ever remember being told to give the volunteers a day off on holidays. Rather, I was always asked to find more so that they could fill in for the droves of staff that took the holidays off. I guess I just wish that organizations would realize our volunteers are people with lives and family. I wish volunteers would be the first ones thought of when my organization considers family needs during special occasions.  And I wish that organizations would properly thank the volunteers who give up their day to help out on holidays with true recognition or a gift or something special. I know my volunteers see through the gifts I buy and pass off as being from the entire staff.”

    It’s frustrating to hear organizations say they value volunteer contributions but fail to treat volunteers as real people who have lives beyond their commitment to us. And really, volunteer managers shouldn’t have to “educate” our management on that fact. Organizations’ managers should have enough people skills to realize that volunteers deserve to also be thought of when planning holiday coverage.

    As management clears out for the holidays, they will turn off the lights and shut their doors. Their laptops and phones and tablets will sit on their desks through the holidays, ready to be utilized, for machines never require time off. Machines are tools without needs, made to be used without consideration.

    But volunteers aren’t just tools now, or are they?

    -Meridian

     

  • Staff Are From Mars, Volunteers Are From Venus, and We Are Earth-in the Middle

    from www.space.com
    from http://www.space.com

    “‎” when men and women are able to respect and accept their differences then love has a chance to blossom ”
    ― John Gray, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.

    Jay, the volunteer manager for a disaster relief organization walked into the monthly staff meeting and took the last seat near the back of the crowded meeting room. The two managers in front of him were snarking about the “annoying always perky operations manager” who stepped forward to give a report on the number of clients served during a recent flood. Jay began to grumble to himself. “Where are the volunteers in this meeting,” he said under his breath. “They are a huge part of these statistics and would love to feel a real bonafide part of this organization. They do everything for us, so why can’t they ever be included in staff meetings?”

    I don’t know about you, but I’ve felt like Jay. Why aren’t volunteers included in staff meetings, celebrations and outings. (and no, having them decorate the Christmas Tree in the staff lounge doesn’t count) Why are we the only ones who think of involving volunteers as equals? Then, when my head was about to blow from my fantasies about never providing another volunteer for you ingrates again, I had a quiet staff member tell me that she felt her job was threatened by a dynamic volunteer. What?????

    Do staff have needs different from volunteer needs and how can we, volunteer managers be the grounded terra firma middle men who are able to intuitively understand both sides? And will thinking about the vastly different needs give us better insight into helping staff and volunteers to integrate? Let’s look at some of these separate needs:

    1. Volunteers need to feel included and valued. Staff need to feel that volunteers will not take their jobs.
    2. Volunteers want to do meaningful work. Staff want help so they too, can do meaningful work instead of laboring over boring paperwork and attending endless meetings.
    3. Volunteers need flexibility. Staff needs a paycheck.
    4. Volunteers want to utilize their skills. Staff wants to feel that their skill-set is not upstaged.
    5. Volunteers want to help. Staff is afraid to let go.
    6. Volunteers want to engage with staff. Staff has deadlines and wants time to work.
    7. Volunteers need teamwork. Staff needs alone time.
    8. Volunteers may be in awe of staff. Staff may be jealous of volunteers.

    We spend a great deal of time trying to educate staff on the treatment of volunteers. Perhaps we can look at staff’s needs as well and take those needs into consideration when introducing volunteers into the mix. Can we reassure staff that we get that they too, have wants and needs when working with volunteers so that they in turn, welcome volunteers?

    I think yes, if we look at it through their eyes. Staff can be intimidated by a highly educated or talented volunteer. Overworked staff just slogging through the day may feel inadequate next to an enthusiastic volunteer who is fresh and able to leave whenever they choose. Staff may have a deadline and not be able to chat with volunteer after volunteer. Staff may have worked hard on a project and may be reluctant to just turn it over to someone who only comes in once a week. So, taking this into consideration, we might:

    Talk to staff before introducing a new volunteer. The old Venus me would have sold a new volunteer by saying, “I’m bringing in Sally, a former CEO and a published expert on human resource management. She brings a wealth of knowledge and experience and will be awesome at working with our clients. She’s a very busy young retiree with lots of energy and talents. I know you will love her!”

    But what Mars staff heard me say was, “Move over, idiot. I’m bringing in Sally, a way better worker than you. She’s smarter and will probably point out every thing you are doing wrong and that’s a lot from what I hear through the grapevine. You’ll have to spend all your time answering questions and listening to her glory day stories and you’ll fall behind in your work. As a matter of fact, they’ll probably hire her which is ironically kinda funny, don’t you think?”

    Eeeck! Maybe I, as Earth should say, “I have this wonderful new volunteer Sally. She is a retired professional who wants to get to know our organization from a starting point and I thought of you and all your skills and knowledge. I am hoping that she will be a good fit for your tasks but I will be checking in with you frequently, especially during her first few times volunteering to make sure that you are getting the kind of help you need. I want you to alert me to any issue you might have with this new volunteer because I know your time is valuable and I want to make sure this is a help, not a hindrance. I know from experience that you will treat her with the respect that will make her a long term volunteer. Thank you for giving her this opportunity.”

    Let’s face it, we volunteer managers are good ol’ Earth, in the middle of staff and volunteers. And since we want to ensure that volunteers are integrated into organizational culture, we may have to mediate that integration in a balanced way by taking into consideration the needs of not just our Venus volunteers but also our Martian staff.

    It can be a tough, mud-filled, seemingly bleak task for us-being the planet in the middle. But, take a moment and look at Earth from space. It is a bright blue haven of all things possible, creative and vibrant. I’ll take being Earth any day.

    Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

    -Meridian

  • The Really Spooky, Creepy, Terrifying Volunteer Management Zombie

    zombie

    It is so dark that your breath hangs, a web in the blackness. Your heart races, threatening to burst to keep from confronting the terror within. You feel something near, just over your shoulder and you freeze because it is moving towards you, intent, and deadly. You close your eyes, as if to hide, but it will find you.

    It is the volunteer management zombie, and it wants to eat your volunteer manager brains.

    Robert, the office manager of a non profit tourist welcome center, walked into the middle of a conversation between staff member Gloria and a volunteer, Ralph. Ralph was telling Gloria, “you should have made more of those brochures. The visitors are complaining that they don’t have any information.” Gloria sighed and looked at a stressed and irritated Robert who suddenly felt the VM zombie nibbling on his brains. “Ralph, can you stop complaining for once? The brochures are on back order for the tenth time already.”

    Ralph shifted his weight. “But I’m the one who hears the complaints from the visitors.” Robert cracked his neck as more grey matter was consumed. “Well, it seems all you ever do here is complain.  I’m frankly tired of it. Why are you here anyway if you hate the way we do things?”

    Ralph grew defensive. “What do you mean, I always complain? I’m here three days a week, I’m always on time, I take on extra work when you need it. I’m beginning to think you don’t want me here.” He looked to Gloria for help and she just timidly shook her head as she was afraid the zombie would see her too.

    In another part of town, Elise stopped in to check on the volunteers preparing dinner at the local homeless coalition. The operations manager, Elise wore many hats such as builder of community partnerships and manager of the volunteer services department. She had just come from a brutal meeting in which the CEO nitpicked her work. Elise noticed one of the newer volunteers, Yvette who was opening cans of corn. Suddenly a battered Elise felt a chewing in her cranium and asked Yvette to step outside.

    “Yvette,” Elise sighed, “according to volunteer Pat, you were 10 minutes late last week. Three weeks ago, staff member Rod said you left 15 minutes early. You know we depend on volunteers to complete their shifts, right?

    Yvette was taken aback. “I’m so sorry, I was caught in traffic last week, I told the volunteer lead. And I left early because we were finished and I was told to go home.”

    Elise, feeling her frontal lobe being consumed, opened her notebook. “Be that as it may, according to our volunteer Craig, you also did not specifically follow the portion rule last week. You gave a quarter cup extra serving of broccoli. We almost ran out of vegetables. Look, you have to follow the rules. We run a tight ship here.”

    Yvette held her tears for later. “I’m sorry, I’m doing the best I can.”

    Elise blinked. The gnawing in her head continued. “Besides, a homeless man said you wore an apron from home. He said he liked it. But, we give you aprons to wear so that you can be identified as a coalition volunteer. Yours said something inappropriate.”

    “It did? It said ‘love’. And I gave my apron to another volunteer who forgot hers. I happened to have my own apron in my car. I told the lead volunteer and he said that was ok.”

    “You’re not taking this seriously. We need better from you,” Elise said as her phone went off. She looked at it quizzically as the cranium nosh escalated.  “Anyway, we’ll revisit this later, I have to take this call.” She walked away, leaving Yvette to wonder why she decided to volunteer.

    In another locale, volunteer manager Sharon looked up and saw volunteer Astrid coming through the front door. For a second, Sharon steeled herself, knowing that she had to sit down with Astrid and discuss some troubling behavior but then, Sharon thought of her impending deadlines and her shoulders slumped. “Not today,” she murmured as the VM zombie cracked her skull open and began to feed. Sharon quickly got up and hurried off to the supply room where breathlessly, she shut the door behind her. “This is crazy, I’m hiding from a volunteer,” was her last rational thought as her brain was devoured.

    Stress, overwork, feeling unappreciated and exhaustion can open up our heads to the VM zombie who dines on our logical brains when facing challenging situations. Robert was emotional and spouted vague accusations. A nitpicked Elise turned around and nitpicked her volunteers while Sharon kicked her volunteer can down the road.

    Dealing with challenges takes every brain cell in our already overfilled noggins. Like Robert, we can blow one day or like Elise, we can gather evidence of any tiny mistake each volunteer makes. And then there’s Sharon, who just avoids it all. In between all this is the professional. logical and ultimately best way to resolve volunteer issues. It is the ultimate weapon against the VM zombie’s gluttonous hunger.

    So next time I’m tired and cranky and under-appreciated, I’ll be listening for the shuffle behind me. Then I’ll reach for my zombie busting bat of common VM sense to protect my belfry and save the volunteers from an empty-headed mistake.

    Hoping you have a safe and Happy Halloween!

    -Meridian

  • Face It: Fit, Attitude, Change, Expectations, by Intervention within a Timeline Part 2

    “Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution.”
    …Kahlil Gibran

    You have a volunteer that is problematic and you are at the point where you believe you have done everything possible to integrate that volunteer. You’ve examined your personal feelings on the situation and feel that you have removed emotion from the equation and are dealing with the challenge in a logical way. So, now what to do?
    Well, think of this acronym- Face It:  Fit, Attitude, Change Adaptability, and Expectations through Intervention within a Timeline. I know it’s a mouth and mindful but hopefully it will help in remembering how to go about working with challenging volunteers. When integrating a volunteer becomes difficult, use this acronym to see if, after interventions within a timeline, there is improvement. Let’s look at each letter in FACE IT.

    Fit: How well does the volunteer fit, not only within the organization, but in her role, with other volunteers, and in the mission? Is the job just the wrong fit or does her philosophy not mesh with the organization’s mission? Does her personality clash with all other volunteers and staff? Is she there for some underlying agenda?

    Attitude: Does the volunteer have a troublesome attitude? Does he incessantly complain? Does he undermine? Is he excessively negative? Is he disrespectful to his supervisors and co-workers? Does he feel that he is superior to the tasks and to the mission?

    Change Adaptability: Is the volunteer able to weather change? Does she dig in her heels when faced with a new policy? Does she refuse to adjust and claims that because it was always done a certain way, you have no right to progress? Does she subvert the mission because she cannot accept new ways and new people?

    Expectations: Is the volunteer meeting clearly defined expectations? Is he chronically late or a no-show? Does he ignore rules and regulations? Does he do whatever he wants without regard to organizational needs? Does he feel that it is not important to communicate with you? Is he a Lone Ranger, but without the white hat?

    These are four pillars of excellent volunteering. When one or more pillars become troublesome, an intervention with that volunteer is necessary. Sometimes it’s just life’s stress that causes great volunteers to go off course. Intervention is never mean but instead, indicates that you notice a change in the volunteer’s behavior and that you respect this volunteer’s contributions and want to help him succeed.

    But help without clear objectives and timelines is futile, so let’s look at the second word in the acronym and the steps of implementation.

    Intervention:
    1. Meet with the volunteer to discuss the area(s) that need(s) improvement.
    2. Point to your rules and regulations, policies and procedures to illustrate your concerns.
    3. Present your evidence, but emphasize your desire to help the volunteer succeed. While note keeping on volunteers may seem underhanded, without details on egregious behavior, your “case” is broad and hearsay.  Besides, specifics help a volunteer see the exact behavior that needs improvement.
    4. Reiterate your commitment to working with this volunteer and then lay a course for how the volunteer can improve.

    Timeline: I can’t emphasize this enough-Timelines are critical. How long do we give a volunteer to improve? Having a clear deadline is effective. Having some random phantom goal in the future will doom your intervention every time.
    1. Set follow up meetings at intervals to monitor improvement.
    2. Make sure you collect evidence of the volunteer’s performance for further steps.
    3. Always meet on premise.
    4. Have at least one other staff member present. This not only gives you another set of eyes and ears, but limits the “he said, she said” aspect and shows the volunteer that you have the support of the organization.
    5. Always leave interventions after asking if the volunteer understands the steps outlined, because if you don’t, that volunteer can easily say that he did not comprehend what was being discussed.

    Interventions are usually enough to motivate a volunteer to succeed, especially if the volunteer is new (having a clear six month probationary period for all new volunteers helps too). But for the minute number of volunteers who do not improve, a “parting as friends” and a “wishing you well” is in order.

    Without upfront, clear instruction and expectations, no manager can assume that volunteers know what is expected of them.
    Rules, job descriptions, termination policies and the steps of intervention must be written and signed by each and every volunteer.
    Infractions must be recorded and addressed immediately with volunteers.
    Often, we view ourselves as too nice to point out egregious behavior. But really, we are not being too nice, we are just practicing confrontation avoidance.
    Instead, the nice thing to do is to help a volunteer excel, not languish, unable to improve, isolated and ostracized by staff and peers.
    The nice thing to do is to create an atmosphere of excellence, of lofty expectations, of volunteer quality so that your volunteers are proud to contribute and your clients are served by the very best.

    Yes, I want to be tender and kind, and I will by being strong and resolute.
    -Meridian

    Oh, next time: Collecting Evidence

  • Horror! Should I Pull the Plug on a Volunteer? Part 1

    plug

    Ebony is in charge of a busy thrift store. The only staff member, Ebony manages sales, donations, store appearance, supply ordering, advertisement and the twenty volunteers who help her throughout the week. She has precious little time for drama or nonsense. Because her volunteers are a tight-knit team, when Bernice, a new volunteer signed up, Ebony placed her on the day the most welcoming volunteers worked. But a month later, those volunteers began to openly complain about Bernice’s attitude. Bernice had quit another resale shop volunteer position and was vocal about her perception that Ebony’s shop did not run as efficiently as her former store. Bernice complained about pricing, merchandising, advertising and lack of volunteer perks such as sizable discounts on merchandize.

    Unused to volunteer conflict, Ebony had several heart to heart talks with Bernice and moved her to a different day. The complaints continued. Frustrated, Ebony hoped the volunteers would work things out, but her stalwart volunteers began to call out sick and take longer vacations.  The once hard-working team became listless, negative and unproductive. Two volunteers quit, giving broad reasons. The other volunteers refused to fill in on the day Bernice worked. Ebony found her team crumbling. Too late she realized that one volunteer could destroy months and years of team building.

    When do we pull the plug on a volunteer? How much trying to integrate one person is too much? This is a dilemma that we all face at some point in our careers. And while we may erroneously feel that we have failed if not every volunteer becomes successfully integrated, we have to weigh the time and effort spent working with a volunteer and their impact on other volunteers versus keeping someone just to keep them.

    I remember a volunteer, Dot from my first years as a volunteer coordinator. She was a retired professional and not only belonged to many clubs and organizations but attained leadership roles in most. She was highly intelligent, but authoritarian and demanding. Her air of superiority was off-putting to volunteers and staff. I once complimented her on her outfit and she said, “I have a doctor’s appointment today and I want to make sure he is intimidated by me.” Everyone tiptoed around her because Dot put her own importance above the mission.  Being new to volunteer management, I didn’t think we could dismiss Dot, but I asked. My senior managers were already afraid of what she might do, and sure enough, one day she went to the board of directors to threaten a volunteer walkout over a policy she disagreed with. Eventually the senior managers realized that something had to be done and she was let go. It was messy. She wrote a letter to the other volunteers imploring them to quit in solidarity, which thankfully, they did not.

    What could Ebony or I have done to integrate Bernice and Dot? Did we miss something? Would spending more of our time have helped? Or is there a point when parting ways with a volunteer is the right thing to do? Can we stop blaming ourselves if occasionally, a volunteer does not work out no matter how hard we try?

    The answer is yes, there is a point when the amount of work spent keeping a volunteer is incredibly lopsided against the benefit in having that volunteer. In weighing whether to continue to try to keep a problematic volunteer, you have to ask yourself these questions:

    Do I spend more time on this volunteer than on any other?
    Do I field more negative feedback about this volunteer than positive?
    Do I find other good volunteers and staff refusing to work with this volunteer?
    Do I find myself worrying what might go wrong when this volunteer is present?
    Do I find myself bending rules and expectations in order to avoid confrontation with this volunteer?

    But, hang on, before we can ask the questions above, we have to do some soul-searching of our own deep feelings on the matter to see if there are some personal perceptions that are keeping us unable to meet the challenge head on.

    By being brutally honest with ourselves when working with problematic volunteers, we can move away from emotion based analysis and into logical resolution.

    Am I petrified of confrontation even though I see there is no forward movement with this volunteer?
    Am I afraid that I will just give in and not stick to my convictions?
    Am I looking at this as a failure on my part?
    Am I thinking that this will make me a mean person?
    Am I clinging to my vision that volunteering is perfect? And that I must be perfect?
    Am I just afraid of the unpleasantness of it all? Do I just want volunteering to be sunshine and kittens and not involve the hard stuff like requiring excellence and management?

    The first set of questions refers to the problem at hand while the second set deals with our own emotions. And lets face it, we have feelings too. But, we can learn to acknowledge our feelings so as to view problematic volunteers in a logical and yet kind way. Sure, our stomach feels like the spin cycle of a washing machine when we are faced with unpleasant conversations, but just remember, by avoiding the issue, it only gets worse, not better. And besides, volunteer success or failure should never be about our feelings, but about the volunteer and the mission.

    Next week, part two: FACE It: An acronym to remember when dealing with a challenging volunteer.

    -Meridian

  • Gobble, Gobble, Good God I’m Frazzled!

    pumpkin2
    Willow, a new volunteer manager for a small organization providing aid to the homeless population in her town, answered her phone the day before Thanksgiving. She had spent long hours that week, organizing and recruiting volunteers to help prepare the annual meal held at a local high school auditorium. Exhausted, her brain overloaded, she tried to muster up enough energy to sound human on the incoming call.

    The caller identified himself as Harry, the coach of a soccer team consisting of 15-year-old boys. “I’d like to get these boys involved in helping others,” he told Willow. “We’d like to come out and feed the homeless tomorrow.”

    Willow felt a throbbing in her forehead. “How many players are we talking about?”

    “Not the whole team, mind you, about 7 or 8.”

    Tears filled her eyes like the bubbles in a natural spring. The volunteer slots were set in stone. It had taken every fiber of her new volunteer manager being to accomplish that. She was bone weary and wondered, why did this man wait until now to call? How could he think that there was no coordination in putting together something so incredibly complicated? Why does no one understand?

    It’s happened to all of us. Often, people call at the last moment to help, especially at holiday times. After it happens, you begin to expect it and it is incredibly frustrating to have to tell a group of willing helpers that they are not needed because they procrastinated or called on a whim. They are, after all, potential volunteers. Granted, most might never volunteer again, but there’s always that little voice in our heads that sneers, “there goes a group that might just have been the greatest group of volunteers known to man. And you denied them. Tsk, tsk.”

    So, what to do if you are not able to just dust off those last-minute potential holiday volunteers? If you feel that a part of your job is to give people the chance to experience the deep, satisfying joy in volunteering, then you will feel a twinge of guilt or sadness when having to refuse someone, even if they called too late. We all know that holidays bring out the desire to help and that each “drop in” volunteer might become an advocate for our organizations.  Can we accommodate those late comers without making the holidays a nightmare for ourselves?

    Yes, there is a way. It’s not perfect mind you, but it’s better than feeling overwhelmed and guilty at the same time. And it takes implementing now.

    So that the future you is not caught in a holiday trap, prepare for the season right now. Before the holidays creep up on you, create some projects that last-minute folks can do. Don’t save the work that must be done but be ready with some extra projects that are off premises and not in direct contact with clients. (No background checks needed). You can invite these one time volunteers to become official volunteers at a later time.

    Start now by asking everyone in your organization for fantasy projects. Ask, “If you had 3 or 5 or 10 volunteers over the holidays, what could they do?” Does marketing fantasize about hundreds of distributed holiday flyers? Does the thrift store secretly salivate over a huge deep cleaning and resorting for the season? Does finance have a tired office that cries for a fresh coat of paint? Is there a corner where an extra decorated tree would look lovely? Do you partner with other agencies and can you ask them if they have projects? I’ve always been able to find a nursing home that was extremely grateful for some extra help during the season.

    You can also create your own meaningful projects. Go to social workers and ask if they have a family that needs Christmas presents because of financial need and then create a “gift tree” with the ages and sizes of family members on paper ornaments. Buying a gift for someone who is going through a tough time is a very satisfying introduction to volunteering. Don’t be afraid to create a project in which the participants will have to spend a bit of money. That never seems to matter.

    One time volunteers can certainly write holiday cards and wishes to older clients or children. They can have a card writing party off premise. Ask a willing volunteer to attend to explain how much these cards mean to your clients. The point is to be creative. You know the difference between meaningless work and projects that can actually enhance the holidays. Have an extra tree to decorate, or paper place mats to color (good for youth groups to do). Ask your existing volunteers if they would be willing to mentor a group when necessary. Stock up on craft supplies now.

    Then, when someone calls last-minute, instead of having to say, “sorry, but there’s nothing I can give you,” you can invite the late comers to get their feet wet by tackling a small but worthwhile project. If the latecomer says no, at least you offered something. I’ve had folks tell me that my organization was the only one  who even tried to place them. That good feeling can translate to future volunteers.

    You, by virtue of being a volunteer manager, take care of everyone around you. Take care of yourself this holiday season by preparing now for those inevitable 12th hour but sincere calls to help. Your future self will thank you.

    -Meridian

  • Success is Everywhere

    This was a post from three years ago and I just wanted to update it:

    I had an open house the other evening for folks who wanted to find out about volunteering in a “no strings attached” forum. You know the drill; people ask questions, hear other volunteers speak, see videos and generally get a feel for what it would be like to volunteer. I’m finding that those who are just a step away from crossing the volunteer threshold will come, have their questions answered and some of their fears allayed.

    There were a good number of people, all asking “How much do time do you require” and “do I have to work directly with patients?” Amongst the crowd was one gentleman who stood out. He was young and dressed quite well, GQ actually. Most people come casual. He was very quiet. Most people ask questions and talk to one another. He sat and listened intently, more than most. What really made him stand out was his intense gaze. He had that look like he was waiting for a magic word or phrase that would free him from his hesitancy.

    Open houses and orientations are great ways to get to know people you are going to manage. They talk about themselves, what they believe, and how they view the world. It gives me some sense of where they are in life and why they want to volunteer. Managing people without pay is hard enough, but not knowing why they are volunteering is just too difficult.

    So, as I’m looking around the room, answering questions, getting a sense of everyone, I’m still at a loss with this young man who by his demeanor, seems to be out of place. And when you manage volunteers, it helps to have everything in place. Chaos is our world, so we appreciate some sort of control.

    After a seasoned volunteer spoke of her experiences, I told a story to piggy back on her explanation of service. I told the group about another volunteer who simply offered a caregiver a cup of coffee. The caregiver who was sitting vigil at the bedside of her dying husband, had said with heartfelt appreciation, “No one has ever brought me a cup of coffee before.”

    I wanted to expound on that idea, the age-old notion that one act can change everything, so I said to the group, “You never know when you will be the one at the very right moment to do the very right thing.”

    At that, the young man became animated and spoke. He told the group that he worked in the corporate world and that he was responsible for keeping some very high profiled executives on schedule. He said that his world was very demanding, moved quickly and there was not much room for connection and gratitude. He simply ended with, “What you just said, that’s the feeling I want.”

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. While I believe that everyone possesses more than one reason to volunteer, there are always those who sometimes know their reasons, sometimes guess their reasons and sometimes can’t quite put their finger on why volunteering will be something worthwhile.

    When I see that light bulb go off, I know then that I can help steer that person in the direction that hopefully will give him what he is seeking. Getting to know volunteers is a lengthy process. With this gentleman, the surface is only scratched. It will take trial and error to see where he “fits” and where he gets what he searches for. Don’t get me wrong, it will be interesting and I am looking forward to learning more about him and his journey.

    Do we know volunteers well? I’d say we know them intimately, because we are nurturing their very beings. I’m curious and excited to know this person and curious and excited to see him receive what he came for.

    Update: After a good amount of trial and error, he did settle into volunteering, so much so that he tells me he is keeping a journal about his experiences. He says he has found a balance between work and his desire to have “that feeling” and has brought both worlds together which has made him feel more whole.

    -Meridian

  • Click, Click, Clique!

    Don’t you just hate it when everything becomes such a fine line? I’ve never encountered more fine lines than in volunteer management, except maybe when trying to decide a reasonable curfew for a teenager.

    Cheryl is new to volunteering. She took a job that afforded her some free time so she wanted to give back. Scouring online ads for the perfect volunteer place, she decided to take training at a local chapter of a large organization. “I was excited, really excited, because I could picture myself actually helping people in my community. I never volunteered before, never had time before and I was nervous because I didn’t know what to expect. So I went to training which was pretty good and then I went to my first volunteer meeting. It was in the evening, and as I looked around at the volunteers coming in, I saw people who looked like they worked too, so that made me feel a bond with them. I took a seat in the back. It was fairly crowded and I spoke briefly to the man next to me. He said he was relatively new too, hadn’t gotten an assignment yet, but was looking forward to starting. The meeting began with the chapter’s director showing a power point highlighting the stats from a previous quarter. Then there were general announcements. I noticed that the same small group of volunteers spoke up with stories or questions and they seemed to continually refer to each other. I figured they were the long-term volunteers. Then they asked one of those volunteers to come up and talk about the upcoming needs. She listed several events and assignments and asked for folks to volunteer. I started to raise my hand, but she pointed at her group and before I knew it, they had all laughingly worked out the assignments. I looked at the man next to me and he rolled his eyes. I guess I should have been more forceful, I don’t know. I thought they wanted new volunteers, but now I’m not sure.”

    Ahhh, the volunteer clique. It happens because of that fine line. When we need groups of volunteers to take on assignments, especially on-going assignments, we work extra hard to find personalities that will mesh. We introduce hand picked volunteers to each other and hope that the team will “click.” I know I get all tingly when I drop in on a group and they are chatting away, enjoying themselves and each other. It’s a real perk to volunteering. You can almost hear the team bonding as each person joins. Click, click, click. It’s wonderful. But then, because of that fine line, some teams, not most thankfully, will click so well that they become exclusive. They shut new volunteers out. They become suspicious of and sometimes actually sabotage the newbies.

    New volunteers are as varied as long-term volunteers. Some are forceful, some are timid. But even under the best of circumstances, being new is challenging. So, what to do when introducing a new volunteer to an established group of seasoned volunteers in order to prevent cliquish behavior?
    Here are a few things I learned by making mistakes with group culture. I hope these observations help you too.

    1. Do not just drop the new volunteer into the group, even if it is only temporary. Talk about getting stiff behavior-I brought a new volunteer into a group one day and I thought I had walked into a meat locker, the response was so cold. Alert the group beforehand, talk to them in person, or call to keep from putting them on the spot.
    2. Talk about the awesomeness of the group to the newbie and vice versa. Let the group know that this new person considers it an honor to join such a fantastic well-functioning group.
    3. Appeal to the group’s sensibilities. I’ve said to groups, “I wanted Doug to join you because he’s anxious to do well and I couldn’t think of a volunteer group better able to show him the ropes.”
    4. Make it temporary at first. I’d say, “Doug will be learning from you and then I hope that he can join a group of his own once he’s ready.” Sometimes the group will just love the newbie and take them in because the decision was their’s to make. If a newbie is not forced upon them, the group is often more receptive.
    5. Check in often. Observing the dynamics of the group will tell you everything about how well the integration is working. Check in to let the group and the newbie know that you care about their success and how they feel about each other.
    6. Reiterate that the organization wants to be inclusive of new folks. I’ve used phrases like, “we don’t want to be the best kept secret,” and “we want everyone to be able to have a meaningful experience. With your help, we can do that with our new volunteers.”

    But what happens if all else fails? I’ve had groups that, when a member or two is out for extended periods of time get angry because the temporary newbie doesn’t operate just like good old Janet or Bob or whomever is missing. Then, when several newer volunteers tell me that they won’t work with that group because of the way they are treated, I know I have a problem, and it’s time for a heart to heart. And here’s where one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned comes into play: Don’t ignore a problem. Ignoring a problem only makes it fester.
    The group and I will have a chat about change. (On their time and turf is best I’ve found so I “drop in”). Change and volunteers is like buying a smaller size skirt and hoping it will be good enough to wear at a presentation. Something usually pops.
    So, we chat. The group may be worried that their missing member is sick and will never return. They may think that new volunteers will come in and critique them. They may feel like they’re not doing a good enough job, because if someone new needs to come in, what does that say about them?

    But back to Cheryl and her experience. As volunteer managers, it’s our responsibility to monitor who gets called to service. We need to especially look out for new people and integrate them into the team. It’s better to look at everyone in the room when speaking and not appear to have favorites by chuckling over inside jokes or discussing past events in front of new people without explaining the context to them. Everything can be an inclusive and teachable moment.
    It’s a shame that Cheryl’s volunteer coordinator did not approach the long-term volunteers prior to the meeting and ask if they would “show the ropes” to the newer volunteers. He/she could have asked, “is there anyone here tonight that is new and would like to join our wonderful seasoned volunteers who are happy to help you acclimate here?”

    Then, Cheryl and maybe the man next to her would have had an assignment. And that organization would be one step closer to having another enthused ready to go volunteer.
    -Meridian