volunteerplaintalk

Tag: volunteer

  • It’s Veterans Day

    Hospices all over are starting to look at veterans in a different light. They are starting to honor and learn about the men and women who have served our country. It is nice to see the push to educate and help those who sacrificed for our freedoms and way of life. Veterans programs are popping up everywhere.

    I have to tell you a story. For the past three years, I’ve been involved in a venture that raises money and honors veterans. A group of us put on an event that shows our local veterans how grateful we are for their service. I volunteer my time for this venture because I feel a connection with this cause and I, too, like most all volunteers reap the reward from volunteering because it does my heart good.

    A man came to see our group while we were in the planning stages. He told us that he had served in Vietnam, had been captured, spent years in a POW camp, then escaped. He lived in the jungle while trying to get back across enemy lines. He existed on rats and bugs and contracted malaria. He was close to death when rescued.

    He wanted to help with the event and we were honored to have him. In fact, we were so humbled by his presence and the looming spectre of what he must have endured so many years ago, that we didn’t know how to even thank him.

    The day of the event he showed up in full dress uniform. He was a spectacular sight. Quietly he came over to us and said, “When I returned home from Vietnam, I was treated so badly that I took off my uniform and vowed never to put it on again. Today, because of this event, I put it on for the first time in 40 some years.”

    That quiet statement hit me square in the heart with the force of a thousand stories. In that moment, all the work, all the stress, all the extra effort fell by the wayside and I experienced the pure joy of doing the right thing.

    How often do we do something because it is right, but yet never hear the impact it has on others? How many people have you impacted today? You may never know today, but there will always be those days, even if they are few and far between when someone will tell you how much your work means to them.

    I always tell the volunteers to multiply those moments by a hundred. We should do that ourselves as well. The nuggets are there, especially if you believe in what you are doing.

    Thank you to all those who have served our nation. It is an honor serving you now that you are home.

    _Meridian

     

  • On the inside it’s gunky after all

    I was just speaking with a staff member about how she feels about her work. There is a a bruised quality to her tale and a sad sense of “something missing”from her experience. I know what that”something missing” is. She used to be a volunteer.

    This is an interesting phenomenon, a volunteer transitioning into becoming a staff member. I’ve know quite a number, because logically, the very good volunteers can one day become staff. After all, we are all looking for the best people, right? Now, there’s a huge difference between those volunteers who come to us looking for a job in the first place and the volunteers who did not start off wanting a job, but somehow they were in the right employment place at the time. I’m speaking of volunteers who become staff members after years of volunteering.

    I’m talking about going from the praise, encouragement, cheer leading, meaningful work environment of the volunteer side to the reality driven, “you are expected to do your job” side of employment. It’s somewhat like stepping out of your warm house on a sub zero morning. That rush of ice cold air enters your lungs and it hurts. “Where’s my hot chocolate and footies,” you lament. Those items are not out here.

    I’ve actually stood by and witnessed a volunteer turned staff struggle for years trying to merge the two experiences. It’s a painful journey for both of us, since I was her volunteer coordinator and I know the tremendous difference she made in the lives of our patients and families. Other staff members who came from the volunteer world will tell me the same thing in varying degrees of honesty. It’s not the same in here.

    One of the ways volunteer managers keep volunteers coming back time after time is by shielding them from the internal nonsense of our organizations. We shield them from overbearing managers, from economic concerns, from mercenary marketing schemes and from the daily grind. We serve up the part of our organizations that should be on the forefront and sometimes is not.

    Should we prepare our volunteers for possible employment? I personally don’t think so. The vast majority of volunteers do not want to work for our organizations. They want to be part time, have that rich and rewarding volunteer experience and then go home fullfilled. They don’t want the things we deal with day after day. Frankly, I don’t want to give them access to the inner workings of the organization. They may not like what they see as much as the version they see now. Because we, as volunteer managers absorb, deflect and hide the trivial and annoying, our volunteers are free to do good work that is pure and untainted. That is a wonderful gift we give to them and we should be proud of that gift. And the gift of an unfettered volunteer to those we serve is truly remarkable.

    There’s another reason not to let volunteers be part of the noisy, grinding engine that is the core of our organizations. Instead of being an oil filter, the volunteers are the steering wheel that keeps our organizations headed in the right direction.That other reason? We, volunteer managers want to ride up front where the view is spectacular, too.

    -Meridian

  • Cue the “stunt” volunteer

    While I do appreciate marketing people and realize we need them to get out the word on services we provide, I am always stunned at their lack of understanding when it comes to volunteers and staff for that matter. Marketing people have a “vision” and the rest of us are all props in that vision. Trouble is, staff is paid and has to put up with marketing shenanigans, volunteers are not and do not have to put up with ridiculous requests.

    When volunteers are asked to show up, stand around useless for hours in case something might happen for a photo-op, it gets really hard trying to convince smart people that this is a good idea. Of course the smart people are the ones they want, because they make the best photo-op, but the smarter the volunteers are, the more they see the photo-op for what it is, a stunt.

    Volunteers don’t come to us wishing to be stunt men, props, photo ops or smiles on a billboard. They come to us for real volunteer experiences. I don’t think for a minute that marketing people will ever get that, because they see all of us as a means to an end. The question then becomes, does this end justify the time of volunteers who could be doing the real work?

    We’ll see. I’ll ask, but savvy volunteers will see this for what it is. Savvy volunteers want a role in an independent film that is meaningful, not a stint as a stunt person for some slick blockbuster.

    -Meridian

  • Just call me “coach”

    Just finished a seminar about the new way to manage staff. It seldom occurs to anyone to invite volunteer managers to staff related education because they don’t think it applies to us. But we see the value and go anyway because managing people is managing people, right?

    So this seminar was all about the coaching method of managing employees, don’t punish, look to the future, listen, ask about the employee vision regarding their job, etc. It struck me that, we, as volunteer managers, utilize this approach every day. Because we have no punishment to dangle over someone’s head, we have to be coaches, not authoritarians. We have this method down pat.

    When a volunteer comes to us, we massage their ego to get the very best from them. We tend to show the positive results from volunteering, the payback in good feelings, self-worth, education and a host of other pay from volunteering with us. We don’t threaten, berate or warn volunteers. If you think of it, compare your success with employee success, that is, how many “incidents” of volunteers behaving badly versus employees behaving badly and perhaps the coaching method has something to offer those who are paid.

    We are experts at coaching people, because, after all, that is what we do, day in and day out, from the volunteer who is starting to look at things from their own perspective, to the volunteer who just didn’t read the new rules. Each one is helped to see the mission and to see their unique and important role in that mission.

    If only those who run organizations would occasionally look to the volunteer department as experts instead of as an afterthought, they might just find some very usable knowledge. By asking us how we manage so many unpaid workers, instead of always purchasing fancy seminars and learning tools, we just might save the organizations some money.

    -Meridian

  • That fine line

    I took a call yesterday from a volunteer who had taken orientation with us several months before. She never really got started in her chosen volunteer job, because a series of events kept her from the initial start. We finally left it at asking her to call us when she was available. She did call and in a very controlled voice told me that she was ready to start and then in passing mentioned a tragedy that occured in her family around the time she completed orientation.

    You can sense when someone is just holding things together. You can achingly hear how one word will send them spiraling into the depths of sadness. In a way, you want to go there, to hear their pain, to let them know it’s ok to lose it all in front of you, but that’s not what they want. They want to make it.

    Feeling that from her, I didn’t press her at all, I simply told her that we would work out what day she could begin. Now, will this be a huge mistake? I honestly don’t know. Do I owe her the chance? I think so. What would normally be a quick run through of the things she needs to know about volunteering will now be a longer, more drawn out process as we monitor her for signs of stress. Some people truly need to add normalcy to their lives after a tragedy happens. It grounds them and makes them better equipped to help themselves. Others don’t do that as well and they almost fool themselves into thinking they would benefit from activity. Volunteering can be very therapeutic for those who freely give of themselves, but it can also immerse the person in tragedy, sadness and overwhelm them with others’ problems.

    It is a very fine line. We will be carefully monitoring this volunteer for not only her sake, but for the sake of our patients and families who, during their time of need, cannot take on another’s pain.

    -Meridian

     

  • Just because you need it…

    Friday I had a frantic call from a mother whose son was in a remedial high school program for youth who were in significant trouble. She needed to have a contract for volunteering with our organization that day. Her son had to go back to school on Monday with a signed pledge that he would be volunteering 30 hours a week for our organization starting in December. 30 hours a week?

    I don’t know about you, but I don’t let great adult volunteers put in 30 hours a week. I know some managers who do, but the success rate is very slim. The only way I let a volunteer give more than 5 or 6 hours a week is if they gradually increase their hours after having volunteered for a time.

    More and more, we are getting requests for community service hours. More and more, alternative programs are requiring students to either get a job or volunteer. Since jobs are so scarce, volunteering becomes the answer and so we get the frantic calls by moms who are trying to navigate the system. Call me cynical, but I told her that I would be willing to interview them both, but under no circumstance would I promise we would accept her son just because he needed the hours. I told her that we could not give him more than 4 per week if we did accept him. She made the appointment for an interview.

    You can bet the first question will be, “what did you do to land in this school?” If the answer is fighting or drugs then the interview is over. While it’s admirable to try to help those who have gotten into trouble, my question is always, “at whose expense?” I know if my loved one was a patient, I would not want a volunteer who just needed service hours or one who was doing a term paper or one who was lonely and bored. I would want someone who was there because they genuinely wanted to help my loved one.

    I patiently explained to this mother that we accepted volunteers who put the patient first, who wanted to make a difference in someone’s life. I don’t think she got that part at all. She was too busy trying to navigate the system for her child.

    -Meridian

  • It’s the Economy, Stupid

    Jill hesitantly came into the volunteer office looking for a job. At first, she said she wanted to volunteer, but after we sat and chatted for a bit, she opened up and said that she thought volunteering might lead to employment. She has been looking for a job for over a year and was getting desperate. She told me that she was “going crazy” day after day, applying for employment and not getting any real leads. We’re going to accept her happily, because as I told her, “if you want us to consider you for a job, then you’ll be on your best behavior.” She assured me that she would be.

    Times are really tough and it is heart wrenching to see so many people out of work, especially when they hope that by volunteering they might get the chance to climb out of the unemployment abyss. Will they make bad volunteers? Not necessarily, but to expect them to give in the same way someone who has benefited from our organization’s services is wrong. They have a dragon breathing over their shoulders, and will leave at a moment’s notice if a job is offered. But while they are with us, they can not only help our organization, but help themselves as well. They can focus on someone else for a bit and give themselves a break from worrying. They can network while they are out, and the boost in self esteem is helpful. Getting up and having some where to go does wonders for the psyche. Volunteering on a resume may not get them a job offer, but it certainly won’t hinder their chances.

    Jill had just missed the first three of the six volunteer classes we require, but I told her to go ahead and come anyway. She promised that she would make up the first three at the next series of classes in another part of town. Not only did Jill complete the three remaining classes, she came to all six in the other part of town for a total of nine. She blossomed when she started the series of classes from the beginning and having three classes under her belt, she became a knowledgeable contributor. When she told me she wanted to go ahead and complete all six classes with her group, I was quietly thrilled. She told me later that she is very worried that she doesn’t have the stomach or temperament for this type of volunteering. She is very hesitant, but is excited to try. Her self esteem has been bruised by so many employment rejections and I hope that she will find some measure of success in helping our patients and families.

    I truly hope she finds a job soon. When that day comes, and Jill leaves us, I will feel that we had a small but significant impact on her life. Often we can’t measure the good work that accompanies our job. The most profound change may not be for the benefit of our charges, but for the volunteer who finds something of great worth in volunteering for us.

    -Meridiian

  • And then out of the blue…

    You know how some days just feel wrong?  Today was one of those days. I had been reading some very interesting articles about volunteer management and started getting ideas that I could adopt for the volunteers I work with when a little voice said, “It’s Friday. Who cares? You’re overworked, underappreciated and tired of the struggle. Give it up.” I wasn’t happy to see any of the volunteers today. I wasn’t all that funny or nice or anything. I was blah.

    As I was sitting there, staring at the computer, willing it to make me feel better, the phone rang. I don’t know about you, but when it rings on blah days, I sometimes let voicemail pick it up and then I call back later. It makes me feel more in control I guess. But for some reason I reached for it. Must be habit.

    I answered and it was Monroe calling from Des Moines where he now lives with his mother. Monroe used to volunteer with us. He is 23 years old. He moved to our area with his Mom to look for work. They lived in an apartment a block from my office with no car, no job and little resources except a grandmother who lived in the area.

    He came into my office three years ago and asked to volunteer. He is one of these really, really quiet types; you know the ones who answer in monosyllables. He speaks in a voice that barely breaks a decibel and looks down as he talks. He is covered with tattoos and piercings and wears nothing but black. He has a goatee.

    To be honest, I took one look at him and wondered why on earth he would want to volunteer and would he scare staff, clients and other volunteers? I gave him the information for the next orientation and thought no more about it. Not only did he show up, he came to all six sessions, and participated, albeit in monosyllables. The other volunteers started to like him.

    Monroe started volunteering in the office. He told me a little about his situation. I could lie and say he opened up, but he did give me some tidbits here and there. I happened to be working with some volunteers on a music project and I mentioned that to Monroe. He said he wanted to help. Now this is a project that a very select few volunteers who have extensive musical experience work on, but I brought Monroe along for a meeting and practice. He not only did anything asked of him, he asked to do more. He informed me that music was his passion.

    From that day forward, Monroe became our go to guy for anything musical, whether it be production, setting up, getting snacks or toting heavy equipment. He became one of us very quickly and every single volunteer took him under a wing. I have to admit I drove him a few places and so did other volunteers. He was always very grateful. I got to see his apartment one afternoon when I gave him a ride home. He was very proud of his room.

    His Mom could not find work and so they had to go back to family in Des Moines. I am not lying when I say I really miss him and so do the volunteers who worked with him.

    After I happily greeted him on the phone, I asked him how he was doing and in typical Monroe fashion, he said “good.” I tried to extract more, but I did get that his mom had a job and so did he. He was working on writing music and doing well. He told me that he wanted to keep in touch with us and I was relieved. I asked him if he found a place to volunteer and he said that he had thought about it, but no, it wouldn’t be the same. He then told me that we were family to him.

    We all have the chance to impact the lives of those we serve by providing the best volunteers we can. We all have those nuggets of success when a volunteer does a great job. But this is different. Monroe is a personal slice of joy for me. I don’t know how much his volunteering experience impacted him, but I can guess that we had a very positive impact on his self-esteem and psyche. I hope we did, and I hope that I never forget that everyone has something to offer. Volunteer managers are fortunate enough to be able to discover and cultivate the talents and desires of the folks we manage. The heck with blah. I’ve been reminded that it’s good.

    -Meridian

  • I’ll Be Seeing You

    I don’t know if you know that wonderful song that was so popular during the 1940’s. It became one of the poignant reminders that husbands, sons, brothers, fathers and friends were oceans away. I thought about that song yesterday and felt nostalgic as I worked with a couple who are new volunteers. They took the volunteer orientation a few weeks back and this was their second Sunday working. As we spent the day together, they told me of their families, their sorrows, their joys and adventures. Both had been married twice before. Both had buried two spouses and their world consisted of myriads of family members that intertwined like a vine that doesn’t know it’s out of control.

    They are of the WWII generation and they worked hard yesterday, happily, intent on doing a good job. They were organized, industrious and matter of fact, the qualities that served them well throughout long, eventful lives. Raising children, grandchildren with and without a spouse will do that to you, especially when a great depression and war is thrown into the mix.

    They approached volunteering with the same joy they reserved for family and golf. As a matter of fact, they were going to try to sneak in a few holes after they were finished. They seemed complete, content that life is complex and will often throw you curve balls. But what stood out to me was their sense of service. Service for service sake was all they craved. And that made me nostalgic.

    The volunteers from that generation always seemed to hold service in the highest regard. They gave of their time because it was the right thing to do and no task was beneath them. This is the generation that rolled up their sleeves and got dirty. Today we are carefully crafting messages that will attract volunteers. We are using new verbiage that will hopefully coax baby boomers and beyond to give of their time. We use leader, mentor, coach, head of, specialist and other terms to make volunteering more exciting. We rework jobs so that they are more meaningful. We create panels or boards of volunteers so that they can manage themselves.

    There is nothing wrong with changing to meet new challenges and change we must. But sometimes, I grow nostalgic for the days when we simply asked for help and the call was answered.

    -Meridian

  • Annabelle’s Eulogy

    Annabelle died today. She was a volunteer, well, she used to be a volunteer about 10 years ago. She hasn’t volunteered lately and very little in the past 8 years because of declining health. She went quietly,in her home, surrounded by neighbors and friends. I wasn’t there. I was working. She had no children and her husband had died over 20 years before so she was a long time widow. No one around me really remembers her because she volunteered so long ago. I remember her.

    Annabelle and I spent many an afternoon together. It was during a time when I managed a volunteer run thrift store. Anabelle did not get along with everyone. She was what some termed “crusty,” and yes, she had a gruff exterior. I always suspected she wore a wig, but I was brought up to not ask.

    Annabelle lived alone and drove a big truck that sported a University of Notre Dame sticker. You see her husband was a professor at Notre Dame so many years before. Her husband taught during the time when Notre Dame was the most feared collegiate football team. She went to the games and grew to love the team.

    She was a Midwesterner, a no-nonsense, tell it like it is person, a sensible woman of great character. Right was right and God help you if you did wrong. She didn’t make friends easily and the other volunteers gave her a respectful berth. Sometimes they complained behind her back that she was cranky, rigid and unforgiving. I told them she was a hard worker, dedicated and sincere.

    Although she was quick to point out mistakes, mine especially, she did it forthright and so did not hold a grudge. We always had a clean slate because she gave me the opportunity to fix whatever was incorrect. She held me to a higher standard when I wanted to take the easier route. Underneath it all, she would have done anything for the shop. And me.

    And boy, did I get her to do things. We would take her truck to pick up donated items from our customers. She wouldn’t lift, but would stand back and then rearrange the boxes in the bed, moving them around like giant puzzle pieces. On the ride back, she would comment on the folks that donated the items, what they might be and how we would best sell them.

    Annabelle’s long time companion was her dog, JuJu. JJ as she called him, was a small mixed breed, scruffy looking dog with clear ocean blue eyes. She loved JJ, not like a child, but more like a best friend. They had equal status in her house and she would often make decisions with the help of JJ’s imagined input. They were inseparable and I would go to her home after she stopped volunteering to have tea and her scrumptious lemon squares and pet JJ as we reminisced.

    I heard JJ is very old and will be cared for by a neighbor. He is frail and will not last long as I’m sure he will die of a broken heart.

    Of all the volunteers I’ve known, why did she and I click so well? She was not the funniest, not the warmest, not the friendliest of the lot. But somehow, our paths crossed at the right juncture. She arranged the chaos and ordered a path into my heart. I shall miss her. I feel the prick of loss amidst peers who never got the chance to know her. Godspeed Annabelle. Your husband awaits, and JJ is not far behind.

    -Meridian